Monday, 30 December 2013

Chapter 19 The Knights

Song Bee Gees - Staying alive   Lyrics   Lyrics

The first knight I encountered was DeadonTime.
Wow.  Can you imagine, such a glorious name?

I'm a huge fan of his. And a shiny golden plated armor too.
Like a sun. But the sun is on the sky, how can it be on the ground too?

Too bad it turned out The Knight did not live up to his name too well.

HE DID NOT DIE! Not at all!

Instead, he stormed through the Mystic Altars of Minotaurs with me. Or in front of me.

I died, of course.
But not the Knight.

It's so hard to kill The Knight, especially when the stepmom is around.

The Knight also has very nice personality. Always. When they enter the room, they pull everyone's attention immediately.

Except Jotunn, who is the most skilled of them all.

He does not pull everyone in the room. He pulls everyone in all the nearby rooms, sometimes few big ones too! That what I call mastership. He's so talented in it. I adore him. With such a swarm of fans around, it's so easy for me to die bravely. And dance with the blades, with the mobs, not with The Knight.

The Knight makes a terrible partner to dance with, since they just stand in a place and swing with their mighty shield. It looks great, but it's not deadly. He probably did not read the instructions or had then the wrong way.

I think The Knights fancy about us rogues, with their shield. It's like a dagger, just a million times larger. I think The Knights must have some kind of complex about size.

Poor Knights, not everyone can be perfect. Oh, this reminds me about Taimps The Fast Hands. He's a half rogue, which makes him a half sane one, hih!. He uses blades on both hands. And he can truly do Dance of Two Blades.
That's really something to watch!

And I watch it often, when I lie on the ground.

I have this friend called Knighttemplar. Can you imagine, he's a knight and owns a temple? I think that's why he's so good when we go into old temples to do some weeding. Nice chap, who likes the football a alot. I don't mean the football the Mage talks about, where you carry the ball in your hands. Silly mages, know nothing about football. Sometimes he loves the football so much I get to die a lot. Such a fine man he is. The Knight I mean, not the mage.

Knights are the foundation of the cake. Essential to keep it all together.

That's a good thing, in case you did not know how to make a cake.

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Monday, 23 December 2013

Chapter 18 Hall of Survivors


Song Bon Jovi - Live before you die  Lyrics  Lyrics

I once told you briefly about Hall of Survivors.

It is a nice place just outside Varanas. Well, if you start walking in the morning, you'll be there before supper. Unless you stop for the supper earlier.

A big cave dug into the mountains. Not my treasure mountain though. Or who knows? I have yet to claim this mountain  though.

We like to go to a family picnic there. I'll tell you how we do it.

First when you enter, go left. Sneak on the left wall, until you come to a bridge. There, have a first snack, since it was a hard walk, all about 80 paces for me, less for stepmom since she has those fast legs to run with and nice to look at, not like dad or me at all. 

Time for first taste of blood of the picnic! Yell the berserk warcry and charge in, tickle  a few times with the dagger, slash with the axe and so, the magnificent Andriol is down. Even mom got a few ice spills on him.

Next rush forward on the right wall, until you come to a tight bend to the right. Don't make a fast U-turn here, but check where the patrols are. Run between the patrols to the other side, to the fence and continue forward to the big pillar. Turn left, avoid patrol, run forward and left to stairs down.  Go round the patrols on the platform.

Stick to the left wall and pass the big guys. They can rip your clothes. I don't mind, since I don't have clothes, I look good without them, but mom and dad could loose their nice clothes, would be a shame. Have you seen them naked? I have, couple of times. Sad story, really.

Now you see Glamo .  Time to stop for a quick drink on a potion, and then, with the lightning speed storm in and around the poor giant, dancing with the blades. Quick check of the treasures, don't forget the mementos and forward!

Run on the right wall until you come to a bend, then avoid the patrol and head forward over a small bridge over the lava. Lava is hot, I don't recommend to fall in, unless you want to be a roasted chicken. They taste good. But I'm not chicken! Not at all.

You face few big guards. Ignore them, turn left, up the stairs, but not all the way. Go right, and towards the fence on the other side, avoid the big guards again. Follow the fence and make a tight U-turn to the left.

Now comes a fun part.

There are 4 guards ahead, very close to each other. It's quite difficult to sneak past them. Of course there are few ways to pass them and not to kill them, but where would the fun be there? So, just charge in and dance with those poor guards. It's a great way to gain rage for the next boss too.

Enter the boss room. Sharpen your blades and engage. Better for you to step on the white ring which appears on the ground, since it helps you. Let it all loose, this one has tough skin. Easy but a bit long fight. Might even break a sweat. Loot quickly and forward! Poor Guldamor.

Turn right at the post of the fence, avoid the big guards and head to the fence on the other side. Go down and avoid the patrol. There is a great room ahead. Full of big guards! More rage to be carried over to Vrantal. Stepmom says I look go like a whirlwind when I dance with those. It feels good. I feel so alive!

Next room is huge. Don't look at the wall nor ceiling, you won't see them. There is a boss ahead. Go in, yell the warcry again and start the chopping. Takes a while since he likes to hide sometimes. Just wait a bit and he comes back and continue. He will be down soon and Mom get's him iced too. Do you know the sound of an axe cracing a frozen skin? That's a really nice sound. I like this double teaming.

After the XL-giant is down, continue again forward. Only bodies behind so why go that way? The fun is ahead. Or not so much fun, sadly, no so much death. But more ahead than behind. That's the way, you can do it.

Go on mainly on the right wall, next to the fallen pieces of wall, avoid the nice bladed guards until you come to the stairs leading upwards. Go round the one on stairs, then run between the two on the wider part of stairs. Stop to check the situation at the pillar.

There is a patrol ahead. And a fat guard. They pose no threat when stepmom is around, but they make the picnic slow.

There is a small opening when the patrol has passed you towards the stairs, when you stand next to the pillar. Go between the patrol and the far guard and follow the corridor to the right. Run on center to avoid more fat guards. Go round the patrol, turning to left, and then turn right again. Go on left side where some wall pieces are on ground, through the opening in the wall.

I think dad was berserk here on some earlier run and broke the wall with his axe. I apologise on his behalf!

Continue on the right wall, until you see a slope upwards and bridge on the left side, avoid the bladed guard.  You enter Zygro's lair.  Just remember to wield the blades, no buffs needed for her. Easy  cake. Us eat the cake, remember?

This is where we have the family picnic festival since we would need more blood to press forward.
We dine with the music, of course. Mom plays tambourine and dad and I try not to embarass ourselves with the rattle and saxophone.  Failing, easily. Enjoying some cake.

Can I have one more bite, please?

Friday, 20 December 2013

Chapter 17 Die hard


Song:  Sunrise Avenue - Lifesaver     Lyrics  Lyrics
The blood was once again running, dancing around. We had to stop for a small while to catch a breath.

Suddely Master Daimon had an eerie look in his dark, strong eyes.
I asked him, what't wrong.
- Nothing, I just remembered something, a nice experience.

- Please share with us.

So he started a story, his voice was weak, almost whispering. Not at all like his usual loud and self confident self. I looked at others, we were all a bit worried now.

I once encountered a shaman in an ancient, snow buried temple. I talked to him.
Then I heard a very loud yell.

A huge minotaur statue in front of me started to move. It was angry, looking at me.
Maybe it was hungry.  I do not know what minotaur statues eat, but I did not want to be an appetizer nor dessert.

So I took my axe and stood there ready.  It charged at me.
You all know how I deal with a charge? I charge back. Best defense is offense!
Two strong heads collided with each other, the earth trembled.

We started to tickle each other. I do not dance like some of those tiny rogues do.
I stand my ground and hit.
Hard. Very hard. I managed to cut through the giant's frozen skin, dropping big chunks of stone like meat.

The giant minotaur jumped. The earth trembled again.
I fell.  Everything started to fade away. I was already facing the ground.


But then I was strong again! Filled totally. So strong.
I glanced around, trying to come up with some battle tactics. I saw a sudden flash peeking behind a tree trunk and I felt like a goddess had touched me, revitalised again. I felt sexy too, my muscle growing. I saw a small fairy too, flying in around

I bit my lip and charged in again. Some more grave wounds on the giant. I could feel my energies returning to me even though I was bleeding.

I was hit hard again. And again. My chains were falling apart. A link after link falling to the blood covered ground.

My nose touched the ground, my eyelids closed. It was all over. I was giving up.

No, I was up again. I felt hot and angry. I felt rage rushing through my veins. I grew bigger.
Then I heard a familiar voice coming behind a tree.
- Take it down Handsome, you can do it. I won't let you die.  I grinned.

My mighty axe swinging I charged again. With a loud snap I saw the giant's left leg breaking, the bone giving up on the axe.  The minotaur fell. 

She's my life saver. The master of them all. She has taught every good Priest I know.
he concluded.

We all listened in awe.
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Saturday, 14 December 2013

Chapter 16 A girl in distress

Song  The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus - Your Guardian Angel  Lyrics  Lyrics

I was wandering in Aslan.
Dancing with the goblins. They have a mine there. Not a big one, but I guess it's good for goblins. and there were plenty of things to do.

Suddenly, with a bunch of goblins with their trash around my feet I hear a cry. Full of fear. And despair. Another goblin was coming to greet me.

I closed my eyes, extended one hand out and started spinning around. When I stopped, my finger pointed towards a hill. This is a professional way to find treasures when you are in no position to roll a dice. For a professional treasure hunter. That storming goblin had accidentally stumbled on the axe that was still in the extended hand, spinning around. Poor thing. The axe was bloody.

So, to the hill I guided my reindeer.

Yes, I had discovered a pack of reindeers recently. I kept them in small bags in my backbag. Some kind of iivil majik. But there was the yell so don't think about reindeer now.

There was a young girl, about my age, who was attacked by a Furious Goblin. Axe in one hand, dagger in the other the Guardian came in for the rescue.

Ouch, the furious goblin bit me to the wrist when I was pulling the dagger out.  Ouch, that hurt! Really.  My left hand started to feel numb.

Now, what is this? It does not hurt at all anymore.
A wonder! So much better than salve.

The goblin was long dead already, but I was astonished, even stunned. By the wonder, both wonders. This could be a life sentence.

She was stunning. Very nice. Good to stare at. And great lungs too. To call for help, I mean.

- Hello my Guardian, I am Zylene.


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Friday, 13 December 2013

Chapter 15 Useless

Song Robbie Williams - Angels      Lyrics  Lyrics

When adventuring with Zylene, we had a lot of fun exploring a cave system in the Aslan valley, while not doing Titles. And at same time too.

We both had received a task to collect a lot of Essence and this cave is the only place where it grows. So that's where we headed. Two younglings, together to an unknown cave. Way out of our league, to be honest.

We started the exploring keenly. Soon it turned out there were crystal monsters around. A lot. Full of hatred.
- I'm scared, she whispered.
- Um.. should we turn back then?
- I said scared, not afraid. But you can do what you will.
  I will be your Guardian angel. Take this soulbond.
- Soulbond is useless, I told her.  But the die was cast, so no sense to cry.

After a while there was a lot of blood around. Let me tell you something: crystals don't bleed. They just shatter to pieces with a kiss from the axe.

Neither does Zylene.  Oh, she does has blood, really good one.
Hot blood.

But, believe me, she does not bleed with me.

So it was all mine.
My red blood, flooding the bedrock floor.

Bad thing, very bad, but so usual situation for me.
Really bad, if it were not for Zylene.

To make a long story short, we cleared all the crystals in the caves. It was a sweaty task, even without doing Titles.

She had to use use all her repertuare to keep me alive.
Boy was she good. Really good. She had eyes only for me. And those hands, she used them so well.

For I tried... I really did.

All but one.
- Soulbond is useless, I told her. 

Little did I know. I was wrong. Dead wrong.

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Thursday, 5 December 2013

Chapter 14 The Priests

Song Bon Jovi featuring Rihanna - Livin On A Prayer   Lyrics Lyrics

The first Priest I met was aunt Aplodi. A fine lady. She's gotten quite old recently and not able to run with people so much. But she sometimes does. I've heard she is awesome, but I've very seldom had her heal me. But she takes good care for me. Or did. Now mostly I take care of her.

Priests are awesome. Have I told you that? Oh, I have? But certainly not enough. So, let's continue.

When I was young, I met this nice Priestess Zylene. Had a lot of fun with her. She kept me alive during my times in the Aslan valley, Dragonfang Ridge and Ystra Highlands. Real talent, and a looker! Good to stare at. Indeed.  And she did not mind. At all.

Once we were exploring the high areas of Dragonfang Ridge, where the trees grow. Those trees the silly mages like so much. We had some tasks from the lone hunters living there, liberating them from the wolves troubling them and helping them collect more pelts so they could buy some food for their starving children.

There were mammoths around, huge horses with a water hose in their face. So, I kindly asked them, if they want to eat a mammoth. They said they would but they have two problems. First, there is this huge mammoth king Rhyst they fear and secondly, they don't know how to eat one.

I made a promise we will help them out. I never break promises.

So, off we went to find this huge hose-nosed horse called Rhyst. Wasn't too difficult, you just had to follow your nose, and the flies.  So, I built up some rage, looked at dear Zylene. She nodded and raised her hands to the ready position.

I took a dice from my pocket. I always carry few dice. A treasure hunter needs them. I selected a 4- sided one, and rolled. The die was cast, no way to retreat.

I charged in.

Now, mammoths are huge. really huge. I mean, even bigger than my mansion. And they have flies all around. And a nasty tail.

I was in trouble! I was spilling blood fast. More mine than his. What can I do?

Before I could imagine any options - and this is not due me being slow in mind, let me remind you! - I felt my energies and blood flow back to me. Thank the god Bon Jovi for Zylene being there!

I continued the dance with the Mammoth. A mammoth is a nasty piece of meat to dance with. Slice, step right, slash, pivot clockwise, axe high, dagger low, stab, jump ahead, duck, now, aim for the wounds. Rise the axe, but let the dagger kiss the skin. Deeply. Now it's time to thrust with the axe. Ouch, that tail did hurt! Oh yeah, Now it feels good again.

Are there flies around her? Quickly, dispose of them. Steal a quick kiss, aaw that's so hot. Let her be safe and back to the mammoth.

Jump up, but aim low. Let it think you are a fly. Wow, he did hit himself with that tail. That's nasty. This leaves the underside unguarded, crawl in! That's just blood, you can wash it away in the river later. It's cold but better cold water than cold you.

Now, continue to the next trunk.

So, we eventually did get the giant hairbag down and into pieces for those poor people.

- Start with one leg, I said when we headed to the Ystra with Zylene.

I did some Titles with her too, mostly in the woods. Shame I lost her somehow. We could have died a lot and lived together happily everafter. Priests make life so complicated sometimes.

The High Priestess Natiomea of the Cult of Trans. Now there is some professional life saver. And a diealot too. Can you imagine that? A real match of talent. And she's my stepmom. I'm so proud I know her.

Gezendorth the Evil Queen is a nice heal too, but she likes the Mage, and focuses on the Mage forgetting us others. So let's forget about her, in return. I've also met this Randomdude, who's heals are very random, sometimes he heals well and sometimes not. Maybe that's why I don't like male healers so much.  At all, to be honest. Not good to look at. And no Titles to be done. Forget them, I said.

Yes, you may have my soul, my dear. Like you already didn't. 

The priests are like a strawberries on the cake.  I love strawberries! And Priests too! Don't forget the Cake!

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Wednesday, 27 November 2013

Chapter 13 Warriors

Song Bonnie Tyler - I need hero  Lyrics Lyrics

Have you ever heard of warriors? Well, I have. it's mainly good.
No, wait. It's bad because they don't die. They just kill.

What's the fun in that? Half of the fun is when you die.

The greatest of the warriors of all time is Master Daimon, who has taught me how to wield an axe properly. Though not completely properly. He's such a strong man, he can wield a huge 2-handed axe with ease.  I'm still a weakling and can only have a small axe in one hand. It's the idea which counts, he says.

Another great warrior is uncle Jotunn. He likes to steal the rage from the mobs when we go to have fun together, so that I don't get any. He also protects me, preventing all mobs to come to my magnetic personality and hug me to death. Such a caring man, he feels like an older brother. I guess that's why he has the fine grey hair too. He's found his rogue heart recently, so he could be my long-lost brother. Or Uncle. Unfortunately he does not look like dad at all, so he must be from the mother's side. I think I need to interrogate him some day. Gently, I promise not to use the axe!

Have you heard of Brolyk? Shame. He's a great sport. Like a heart of a true rogue born inside chains. He likes to go on a pack of mobs and die stupidly^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^H heroically like a true rogue. Such a bravery. Shame he's into chains. But he loves good leather, though only when it's on Gisselle. I guess she has the perfect tan. I wonder if he's oiling her too, like the chains. A Great man.

Like I said, warriors are great fun and friends to have. But they have one huge flaw. They don't die!! Not easily, and especially Master Daimon never dies. Except for Brolyk as I explained.

They're bad in digging treasures and they need to oil their chains all the time, or they rattle so much one can't sneak pass a patrol in Hall of Survivors. Which is not a place for me, though, not alone. We'll get back to that later. It might be fun to try the chains, and the oil too, and rattle them. Or... well, I sometimes do that in the basement of my mansion. Alone, when no-one is there to see.

Warriors are the cream of the cake, but I guess all those failed rogues need to have something to do, too.

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Tuesday, 19 November 2013

Chapter 12 Story of My Life

Song  Bon Jovi - Story of My life  Lyrics  Lyrics



Just listen to the song and read the lyrics, thats the whole chapter this time :)



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Chapter 11 About Treasures

Chapter 12  About treasures
Song Roxette - Speak to me       Lyrics  Lyrics

I love treasures. Like I love dieing. And priests who revive and heal me.

Have you ever faced a treasure to die for? 


Well, I have. Many times. And died too. Even more times.
And I have also faced treasures not worth dieing for and still died.  A lot.

Treasures are fun.

There is this nice thing I run everyday, first thing in the morning, when I'm alone. It's so refreshing and revitalising. You should try it sometimes too! All done in 4 minutes, before breakfast.

I sneak in from an entrance, grab a torch, set some cave ghosts on fire and light some candles. But take care, for there are some guards still walking around. Hide in the corner.

Go on the other side. Watch out, he's coming back now! Now quickly, fake dead!
Oh yeah! I can do that. I'm actually pretty good in lieing face down on the floor. He does not pay attention to me. I know my business, trust me!

Now he's gone, get up and run. No, wait. Stop!

Open the small jar in the corner. Wow, a guard commander's suit.
How did he forget it in here? If his suit is here, where is the naked commander running? You better watch out!

Salute the guards while you pass them. Don't run. Commanders don't run. Except when they chase you. Are you chasing yourself? I did not think so.

Last candle ahead.

Now wait and hide again in the shadows at the far corner.  Prepare your shot. Yes, you got the magic bow when you stumbled at the treshold at the entrance. No, it's not a cane, it works as a bow.

See the guard dog at front of that candle? Aim carefully and let it go. The arrow, you fool! You never make a scout.  Ok, maybe you just better play the dead again until the dog is gone. But be careful, the dogs can smell a fear. And wet panties too.

Finally go in and loot 20 chests full of treasures!

You know what annoys me? I am so weak I can only carry the load of 15 chests! Such a waste of good treasures. No, No, No, don't touch it. Oh no, that's the candle that you must never touch. It ends this dream of treasures. Always. Sadly.

I am the owner of a treasure mountain.

Lies! 

I am the owner of at least 5 treasure mountains! I wonder, in what world shall I deposit them all? And what shall I do with them? Should I share? But with whom? It starts to be a bit difficult to keep count on them all. Some might even run away.

I love treasures. I wonder if there are even more bigger Treasures to be found? And how?

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Wednesday, 13 November 2013

Chapter 10 The Iron


Song  Bon Jovi - You Give Love A Bad Name   Lyrics Lyrics


I think my dad is cheating on my new, hopefully to-be-step-mom.

Every so often he goes off and says he's going to "the gym". What ever that means, leaving me and new mom astonished and dieing with the others. Which is a good, though. But not for family relations.

He says he likes to 'pump the iron'.  That sounds perverted to me. How can you pump iron? He must know some dark things yet undisclosed to me. Some days I wish I were my dad. I  know pumping of water, but where is he pumping the iron to?  And why? I  know also how to stick a dagger into something, but you can hardly call that pumping, you just plug it and out once. Well, sometimes a bit more times. But I would not call that pumping. And it would be a disgrace to call a fine dagger iron.

A dagger, or any good weapon is made of steel. Before you silly mages say anything, let me remind you that your wooden sticks are not weapons, not even threats. They are good only as pokers when you need to take care of the fire. And to burn too. That's why you silly mages have those sticks.

Back to weapons. The sharper, the better. It takes a real blacksmith to forge a weapon. Like my uncle, master Jotunn. He can make anything from a nice chunk of ore and wood, refine them into molten alloy and then caress it with a heavy hammer and finish with whetstone. Marvellous, you should see him work  some steel. He does not even break a sweat while doing it.


I can work with a forge and anvil too! But all I can do are some small shiny things. They're quite nice though, I like to wear them sometimes, though they make me look like a christmas tree of some sort. Like those you see in Logar.

But boy do I hit heavily when I use them! Wow. I can even beat my dad when I have those shiny things on me. Not beat him like to death, but beat him in beating trolls. I call those shiny things "beat dad in beating the trolls, dragons, plants, chupuras, beetles, machines and all mobs accessories".

I guess I could do something nice too if someone wanted. For a reason.


But iron? Dad, I'm worried. About you. And stepmom. Not me. Not this time. Which leaves me puzzled.

Last nigth stepmom was so sad, with dad gone. Maybe I need to do something?  He's told me to do what the stepmom says. What can I do?

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Tuesday, 12 November 2013

Chapter 9 Titles

Song Madonna - Like  a Virgin      Lyrics: Lyrics


Now, let me tell you about titles.

They are awesome. Well, to be honest, not all are awesome, they are mostly quite dull. But the getting them is the fun part.

Like chasing a chicken, it's fun to chase a chicken but the fun ends when the sharp edge of an axe finds the neck. That's the end of the chicken, don't put your fingers in there or they end up with the chicken too! Afterwards you have just two pieces of a chicken and a bloody axe. But sometimes you get a title too.


I was once walking around, after exploring new corners of the world. Recovering.
Meeting friends at the Howling Mountains. Like grand step-auntie Agnes.  She's always been talking nice to me when I walk by her on may way to the auction house to get rid of all the junk I've gathered in my bag. She is not interested in the junk at all, she's a bit tired since she has trouble sleeping in the night. I think it's because she does not flex her muscle enough, she just stays there and talks all the time.

Then I met my new step-mom there. Though she was not yet my step-mom, but I had seen her with dad quite often already. I think she was checking us out at that time. Trying to make up her mind.

Suddenly this lady says she wants to introduce me to the Cavern of Trials.

She explained she could gain a title with me and that's what she really desires. She needed my hand to help her down there.

- Well, I have nothing else to do, so I could please the lady, I thought and went off with her. If dad is not here to take care of things that must be done, then I'm the man in the house. Or village. Or in the world. Same thing, once we take over the world.


So, we got to the the cave eventually. The entrance was pouring with some slime. We passed them  quickly and got inside. Everything so nice and tidy. Like a home. Except my home is a mess. So it's somebody else's home.

- This is not right, said the yet-to-be-new-stepmom. Something is missing. There are supposed to be some little things around, she explained.

Maybe it was her home, since she knew something was missing? Or is she a frequent visitor? Who knows. At least I don't. Or didn't at that time. Now I know better.

- Ok, let's get some professional help then, I gave up. When a lady says no, what can you do?

Well, we got the help quickly and rushed back to the cavern. I won't tell you about the help. It's so humiliating to get a child to help you. I was really hoping that now it would work out properly.

Now, before we continue, I must confess this was not my first time doing this stuff. I had once tried the thing years back. All alone, in the night, with a bump. Now, with this lady, it was totally different! No bumps at all. But don't tell my step-mom, she does not need to know. I was excited to do this with company.

- The first time I made this, it made my stomach full, she confessed.
- Wow, she must have some appetite, I wondered.

Again, in the cavern, with the to-be-my-new-stepmom. And the little things. I started to play with those little pests but she called me to come quickly. Always in a such a hurry, no time to play around at the entrance, so I kindly proceeded.  There was something coming at her. So, I rushed in, knocked it down and checked the treasures, like I always do. Damn. She got there before me. 

- Awesome, so this is how you do Titles?
- Yes, and you were very good at it. I want to do more Titles with you.
- Yippee, I am now The Trailblazing Explorer of her Cavern of Trials!

Titles are nice.
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Friday, 8 November 2013

Chapter 8 Relationships

Song: Leningrad Cowboys & Red Army Choir - Happy Together  Lyrics: Lyrics


Relationships are complex.

And for you mages: I don't mean the ships that float over water until you have silly mage with a fiery ball and then you get your panties wet  kind of ships.



Jotunn is such an inspiration to me I grow bigger in size. Not like that! He also prolongs my life, which is good. More life means more time to kill and more mobs to attract. I hope I have similar affect on him. Shasta the silly mage also inspires me, but he's not as good as the Great Jotunn, that's because he's a mage. Taotacan the scout is quite promising on this field too, but being a scout, she's noway to match the Great Jotunn. Good to look at though...

My step-mom makes me feel myself so talented I think I could do anything in the world! Such an inspiration. I hope I'm some kind of an experience for her, too.

Daimon the Demon Slayer (which makes him one, too) is a Master to me. He's awesome. We're so much different at every aspect, we get a long so nicely. I must tell you about him some day.

It seems, I'm an occasional experience for Gisselle too. Which makes it quite fun. She's nice but I'd say too slender, I always mix her and her huge bow.

I have several close friends who help me to dig better treasures. That's very nice! I love friends. And treasures. And dieing.  A treasure to die for, like the Dad says. He also says, one must die before a good treasure. Usually that means me, dad or new mom, or all of us. I love a good family wipe! And Treasures also. I need to tell you about those too, some day. 

Mayaserana is a great friend to find treasures with.  And to look too, though she is a bit twisted, you know. Shh..  She likes e-l-v-e-s. shame. But she has great arms. And legs to run with. And nice sharp blades. Oooo. she's dangerous, mind you. Poor elves.

I have this huge mountain of shiny steelcovered friend Knighttemplar, who wanted to bond with me somehow, but then he decided not to, since I was not his family.  This is so complicated.

I've heard there is yet some kind of extra level of relationship, but I'm yet to discover it. Maybe I need to gather more friends around to discover it, if it's like a Treasure?


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Wednesday, 30 October 2013

Chapter 7 More about Mages

Song: Bon Jovi - Burning for Love  Lyrics:  Lyrics

Few more words about mages.

I have this step-aunt Aplodi, who has taken care of me so nicely during my early days, when I had no dad and no step-mom. She has given me some gold when I was poor.  Recently, she has taken up to herself to take me out to do things when dad or step-mom are busy. She usually takes me to play with goblins or cyclops. They scream so funnily when her fires tickle their feet. And she makes them tickle, few times each.

I like some mages. I guess that's because she's not very talented with the majik, which means she is not too tainted and that must explain why she is so nice. It's very heatlhy for her to be in the healing business like my new mom. Too bad she's not as good as her yet though. And definately not in the dying business either, which proves she is noway related to me. But she does have two hands...

I was once exploring some plant infestation in an ancient temple. We had some big mouthed mage there with us, since we could not find any real killer that day.

He had a huge stick (wood, do you remember?, those silly mages stick to their silly wooden sticks), which was second only to his mouth.  I think he must be one of those who are said to stun people with their sound.  We cannot say he didn't try, at least.

Boy was that person a greedy one. And never satisfied with anything. I mean, why to come to find treasures if you never like what you see? And he was so much only about himself, bragging all the time. I think he scared all the treasures away with his big mouth and sharp tongue. That's a skill too, but not a good one when you're there in for the treasures.

One more thing about mages. Have you ever tried to have fun with them? No, this time I don't mean fun at their expense. I mean going to some place where you have an excellent chance of dieing while you try to take over the world?

Well, I have. It's a sad story. When you are in the good killing business, hands dirty and all that gore around you, while the red mist goes away, what do you see? A mage walking near by, picking the pockets of the torn apart clothes you see all around you, like they're trying to be some rogues.

Hah I say, everyone can pick a pocket of a dead monster! Even a mage.

When you asked, how they did in the battle, what do these mages answer?
- There was an obstacle between me and all those monsters, so I just sat down and watched.

Damn those mages. When you fight, there are no obstacles. You just swing your axe and everything opposing you, including monsters and obstacles fall. A good rogue never sees obstacles. Only targets. By the way, they complain the same thing about the barn, too.

Silly mages. I guess there has to be a thing for those who cannot wield a good blade or two, too.

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Saturday, 26 October 2013

Chapter 6 About Questing

Song Elvis Presley - Confidence  Lyrics: Lyrics


Questing is very nice.

Let me tell you something about quests now. Pay attention for this is quite simple stuff, even for those silly mages.

I think about 3rd quest I did was to meet this gorgeus lady called Meydo. Before this the
mayor George asked me to get him some statue he had (accidentally, I think)  tried to sell. Why would he be selling something in the auction house and then ask me to get it back? Remember, you put something in the auction house and get gold back. Either he had an accident or he does not have any idea how the system works.

Back to  this lady Meydo, an angel I might add. I just went to her and greeted nicely. Ok, there might have been a wink of an eye too. She smiled at me and gave me a key to a house.

- Thank you, this is the key to your house? I inquiried.
- Oh no, this is the key to your very own house, mister.

I guess she did not trust me enough to give a key to her house. Not just yet. She gave me also some papers but said I don't need to bother with those since I'm such a nice guy, so I tossed them away. Also, she gave me some gold so I could get a carpet in the house too. Such a nice gal, and rich too! I wonder if she's taken?

Can you imagine what you can do with a house? I'll tell you.

You can put stuff in it. It's like the auction house I told you before, except you don't get a million when you put something in. You just put stuff in and it will be there also tomorrow! Excellent thing for such a treasure hunter as myself. 

The angel Meydo also gave me a chest to put into the house.  It took me a while to figure what to do with it, so I used it as a bed. Then I forgot an old piece of junk in the bed one day, and when I returned home later, I found it there still!

Amazing. Earlier if I've left junk lying around, it had disappeared fast, even the valuable ones. But when I put it on the bed, it stays there until I take it off there.I'm quite fond of those chests now, I think I have at least 7 of those.

Where do I sleep now, you may wonder?  Angel Meydo sold me for a very reasonable price a nice tub, which is like a chest but it sucks all junk yuo drop in there, so it's not like a chest, and it has no lid. But you can sleep in it and that's fair enough for me.

The angel also asked me to visit her friend. I think she was trying to pair me up, I wonder why. She already had a doggy master so I wasn't too keen about it. But she gave me more gold anyway.

So, quests are nice.

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Wednesday, 23 October 2013

Chapter 5 Mages

Song: Ash - Burn Baby Burn  Lyrics: Lyrics


Before we go into questing, have I ever told you how I love mages?

I have this friend Shasta, who loves the trees so much he carriers one with him all the time. He's great, for a mage, you know. One can't be too picky with those who set everything into fire.

Nice people, those mages! I mean, when you give them a bunch of mobs and say 'Go', like throwing a stick for a dog, they go in nicely and obediently and burn the fat out of those mobs. You know how unhealthy fat is? He does such a great thing for those poor things.

Being a mage and wearing nice clothes makes him very strong and popular. He can enter any room and instantly pull everyone's eyes on him. And their hands too. Too bad they have stuff in their hands, like sticks, swords and other different pokers, but he still is the last man standing, unless he dies first, of course. That happens a lot too, he's almost as gifted as Us.

Being a mage is very simple, you just walk around and do that fire thing around you, burning everything and walk with asbesthos boots. But when it comes to killing mobs away, and staying next to friends, that seems to be too much to ask.

I do not know what I would do if I were a mage. Having only one skill is way too complex to me. I need a handful of skills and second handful of buffs and a third handful of potions to keep me alive. Hmm.. but where do I get that 3rd hand? Maybe that's why I die so often. Why did not I born as a tritraduntur ?
That means one with three hands, for those who are not into the secrets of Rogues. Maybe my 2 hands prove, that my mother has only two hands too? This is so good news, reduces the amount of suspects a bit.

Back to mages. I heard they can do some nice things like freeze a running man standing into his steps, but all I see around is some lightning and thunderstorms.  So this looks like a confirmed myth to me.

Have you ever paid attention to their attributes? All filled with intelligence and other iivil majik stuff. For what? They still cannot hit a barn wall with that piece of tree they have in hand even when they are standing inside the barn and their both shoulders touching a wall. Talk about intelligence there!
No, In a barn, you need an axe. End of story. And the barn too.

I don't understand mages. And they don't know how to read, they confessed. So we're safe here.

Mages are like candles in a cake; not necessary at all, nice to have once a year and need to control them all the time. A nuisance.

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Saturday, 19 October 2013

Chapter 4 Elves

Song: Bon Jovi - The Beautiful World   Lyrics:   Lyrics

I love elves.

I even carry an Elven Encyclopedia with me to understand them better.  I'm still on page 2, after the blank first page. The book is marvellous, so far.  I got it from my dad, the famous and handsome Transcend, I think you may have heard of him? I think he was not even able to open it, so I'm setting the family record here!

My first encounter with an elf was with a pointy eared Dúnedain. There you have a fancy looking fellow, always wearing his tuxedo and hair done. Although I'm not sure about all that stuff on his head, what is hair and what is not. But a nice chap. I think he has an identity problem, like so many of those tree huggers seem to have, they never seem to know what they should do, some day making real people live longer, other day throwing sticks around, then going around with a fancy sword they don't even know how to wield. I mean, you swing an axe, not a sword.

Did I tell what I think about tree huggers? I don't have such a warm and fiery thing for them like my friend Shasta, who likes to see flames everywhere. But do you know why the axes were created after all...?

I don't dislike them, don't get me wrong. I've once met a nice elf who could keep me alive when I had once again gotten into deep old trouble. That was amazing, like dieing and being reborn multiple times during same second! You should try it too! But haven't seen such an useful elf for a long time now. Rarities they call them, and serve on silver plate in a museum.

I don't understand elves at all.

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Chapter 3 My first guild

Song: Bon Jovi - What About Now   Lyrics: Lyrics

When I was around level 10 in Howling Mountains (remember, that was the whole world to me those days), I saw a lot of guilds looking for new members.I was wondering what's all that fuzz about.

So I asked one of them what's a guild. The reply was to invite me right away to this guild. Being naïve and innocent (well, at least those days) I accepted their invitation and started learning the fancy life of a guild member.

To be honest, I must say my life did not change at all.

My boots were still dirty. Oh, oh wait, hold on a minute there. I don't use boots, I walk barefeet, so it must have been my toes that were still dirty. And I still had to kill my bear friends myself, no one helping for me.  Well, I did not require any help there but I really would have appreciated the gesture. And I did not get paid for membership. nor did anyone dance for me. Later, when I met my dad, he told his guild members dance for him.

Anyway all those 2-3 days I spent in the guild, no-one talked to me, or I think to anyone, no chat although I saw several members there. I asked some questions which troubled me, but got no answer.

I think they were all too busy, or numb, or both. There is an option they were permanently stunned by my magnificent presence.

So after few days I declared my independence, saddled up the 2-hour white horse I had rented and left them to cry for their loss, which they probably don't realize even today.


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Friday, 18 October 2013

Chapter 2 Lonely

Song:  Bon Jovi - Only Lonely   Lyrics Lyrics

My early years were quite peaceful in Howling Mountains.
I was learning who and what I was and what I want and can do, exploring myself. I had not found my dad yet, I was all alone in the night.

All I did was slay Young Bears. All night long. They were my only friends. Not for long though. I kissed them quickly with my axe and they gave their hands, one after another.

I leveled from level 1 to level 12 with them. Made myself a millionaire in the process. That was nice. Being 12 and a millionaire. And nothing to do with the gold. How I did it?

I sold all bear paws in the auction house. Never heard of it? It's a great thing.
You put junk in and get a million out, marvellous!

I also put those nice blue jeans with a yellow stat on them. They vanished on fast pace and I got myself lots of gold. Lovely.

Should I be selling everything? Or just let my hands do their magic dance? I had an urge to do something but I was unaware what. Or how.

Then I heard about questing. I will talk about it after a while.
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Thursday, 17 October 2013

Chapter 1 It's My Life

Song: Bon Jovi - It's My Life  Lyrics: Lyrics

My name is Nivatix. 


I am the son of the great Transcend. A professional Die a lot with a perfect accent and great taste of humour. Dad, not me. He has to love humour, since he enjoys lying on the floor, face down, with me. Only thing we can do at those occasions is to make fun of each other.

My dad is a son of some unknown jester. That's why he looks like one, with a fancy hat with multiple tentacles and jingle bells.

Luckily I don't look like him at all. Except that we're both handsome, he when he has clothes on, and me when I don't. That's why I never use clothes.

I don't know who my mom is, and neither does the dad. We have no suspects and no-one has ever come to claim me.

I have this ex-stepmom Haze, whom I never met and the relationship with dad lasted only few weeks. He was not too feminine, I guess that's why Haze left dad. Dad sometimes cries over him.

So far my longest lasted stepmom has been the "the enourmous hair" Naylodas. I do not know about her features, since her beard and hair cover her up. I don't even know if she wears clothes at all. She does not need to.  She always drains my enegy and often puts me to sleep. In return, I get to hit her occasionally with my friends and touch her treasures.

Recently my dad found a great stepmom in Natiomea, but that thing did not last even until the honeymorning.

Poor both. Or not 'poor', actually, I've heard they're both rich like uncle Scrooge. Not my uncle, sadly, but Donald Duck's uncle. Maybe I should hope I would inherit them both some day?

Anyway my ex-stepmom must like him alot, since she constantly saves his life. I guess she must like me too, since she saves my life also practically every other second. Could she be my real mother?

I have one suspected stepsister, Darramba. I suspect that she is my stepsis since she shares the great looks, with red hair and love for sharp weapons and suicidial, reckless behaviour. Dad does not remember her mom either, nor her history. I warmly welcome her into the family though. She has been married to my ex-stepmom. This all is not very confusing.

I have a great profession: collecting debt. My dad and ex-stepmom are even better with this, they have such a nice equipment it makes me drool so much people think i wet my panties. Which never happened, I swear!

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Tuesday, 1 October 2013

It's my life!

Hi everyone!

This is a multimedia story. Each chapter will include a song, specially picked for the chapter, carrying always at least half of the story. The story has several layers I repeat: several. Everything is not written out clearly, but purposefully in a certain obscured way, but hopefylly will become clear for you readers at some point, so you really can enjoy the mixture of the songs and the texts.

The story is about Nivatix and his friends in a virtual world called Runes of Magic, which is a massive multiplayer online roleplaying game (MMORPG). Free to download & play, so everyone can enjoy and join in :)

The baseline of the story was first published in 2012 for the friends in game, but I felt the urge to tune the text and publish for everyone. There are some 30+ chapters waiting for you :)

Main factor for the whole story is the amazing amount of coincidences with Bon Jovi's lyrics & song themes and Niv's complex and very fun virtual life.  

Nivatix is a role playing character, made purposefully with certain characteristics. The game itself does not record nor utilise these attributes, but I had those in mind from the beginning (since 2008) and have played the character according to these features. He has turned out as a very enjoyable hero, who throws himself into weird and risky situations.

He lives wholeheartedly and would not change a day. It's his life and he does it his way.

Go ahead, choose Basic storyline and enjoy!